Interview
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Guidelines for Publishers How
to Create Instant Rapport with Your Interviewer Making
a good impression with an interviewer is surprisingly simple when you follow this
simple method. You will be astonished and relieved how easy it is to make yourself
stand out amongst many candidates. Getting an interview is hard enough.
You've already spent time and effort writing
your resume and distributing it. Now you've got to the all important interview.
Only one person will get the job so you owe it to yourself to make the best possible
impression. If you can make yourself instantly likeable you will have an important
head start.
Ever noticed how lovers in a bar will sit facing each other
across a small table and adopt the same pose. Their synchronicity indicates a
desire to be in tune with each other. As one changes position watch how the other
will soon adopt the same new position so that their bodies remain synchronized.
This behaviour is called mirroring because they place their bodies so
that they are a mirror image of each other. And this behaviour isn't just confined
to lovers. Watch a small group of people in any meeting, whether social or business,
and you'll soon be able to tell who is in tune with whom and the ones that are
feeling less comfortable with their companions.
Next time you are with
someone make a point of adopting the same body position. If they are standing
at a bar with one elbow on the bar and their ankles crossed, stand next to them
in the same pose. You may be surprised at how quickly they respond more warmly
towards you.
As they change posture wait a few seconds and then slowly
slide into their new position. Don't be shy because they won't consciously notice
that your movements are deliberate. But their subconscious will be aware and interpret
your mirroring as a friendly gesture. They will also feel safer facing someone
who looks the same.
The first time I heard about this technique I was
somewhat skeptical. I had to attend a business meeting with someone many miles
away so I thought I would try mirroring him on the basis that if he realised what
I was doing or reacted unfavourably it wouldn't matter much as at least I wouldn't
have to make the same long journey again.
I decided that I would mirror
him but not lead our discussion. Instead I would let him do all the talking and
only talk when necessary. We sat on opposite sides of his desk and right from
the beginning I adopted his pose. Each time he changed position I would follow
within a minute or so. He was a smoker but I am not so I held a pen whilst he
smoked.
Our meeting began at two o'clock and I thought it would last
about an hour or an hour and a half at most. But I was in for a big surprise.
After two hours there was still no sign from him that our meeting should end.
For my part I was intrigued at how well we were getting along. He kept
telling me how pleased he was that I had come so far to meet him and how much
he was enjoying our conversation. This was a surprise especially since I had hardly
spoken.
When it got to half past five I had to interrupt and make my
apologies for bringing our meeting to a close. Again he thanked me profusely for
visiting him.
Clearly the fact that I had been a good listener was very
important but without my mirroring I do believe he would not have felt so at ease
with me.
Since then I have mirrored people in all sorts of situations
and have always had a positive response.
More recently I have introduced
mirroring to job candidates who have all found it beneficial. It even works if
you are being interviewed by a board. As a board member asks a question, swivel
in your seat to face the questioner and at the same time slide your body into
the same posture they have.
Mirroring happens unconsciously between people
who like each other. By deliberately mirroring you are simply showing that you
are in tune with another with the result that you will receive a positive response.
Try it with the next person you meet. Once you are sure of its beneficial
effect you will have the confidence to use it at your next interview. Of course
you will still have to prepare
for the interview and answer the interview questions correctly but mirroring
will certainly tip the balance in your favour.
Michael Soliatis writes
about resume, interview and career
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